Posted in Uncategorized on July 30, 2011 by alanburton09

Welcome to my new website.

I am promoting the various areas in which I have distinct interests.

I have continuous publishing ideas, a third book in the works, and am seeking author’s agents and publishers to fulfill those goals. Represented in this blog are the two books which I have already published. I am seeking additional marketing strategies for them as well.

Please visit the various links to see what else I am trying to accomplish: Illustrations, quotes and graphics on products, and audio voice overs. I seek aggressive agent representation in these areas. Currently, on the ‘boutique’ link, my quotes and images are available on shirts, mugs, bags, and more.

By all means, leave any messages, and/or suggestions, as to how I might attain some of these goals if you so choose. I look forward to reading them. There is also a direct link to my Facebook account here in this blog, and my email address, should you choose to contact me that way.

I sincerely hope that you enjoy this site, and please, share it with all of your friends, and anyone who might enjoy sense of humor on products and in print.

Thank you



AuthorHouse book review

Posted in Uncategorized on May 30, 2011 by alanburton09

Bloomington, IN, August 11, 2009— In “A Wayward Wizard’s Wistful Words,” author Alan Burton stimulates his readers’ minds by capturing numerous moments in time through witty quotes he has accumulated over the years. Burton compiled several short quotes that he shaped through his career as a writer thus far. These quotes span a plethora of topics and situations Burton encountered, touching on love, work, family and more.


Burton is no stranger to self-expression; he is a published poet, journalist, illustrator and now author. The inspiration for this book came from frequent, short notes Burton would jot down in his folders while working. These snippets portray lessons and thoughts about morals, knowledge, inspiration, chaos and many other life issues.

His quotes are short and simple but also thought-provoking, insightful and often humorous. “A Wayward Wizard’s Wistful Words” has something for everyone to enjoy, ponder or discuss. The topics of quotes are endless, and any page of this book is sure to stir up conversation. Burton freezes simple moments in life, adds his insight, and creates meaning through his passages.

“Success is determined by how much it cost you to attain it.”

“There are two important things in life: One is memory, and the other one I forgot.”

“After age forty, celebrating a birthday is an insult.”

“Aspiring for what one has not yet accomplished

Is the only true measure of self-worth.”

Paperback, 58

ISBN: 9781438945514

Retail Price: $8.40

“A Wayward Wizard’s Wistful Words” is available at, and

About the Author:

Alan Burton was born in Great Britain and moved to the United States in 1968. He is a published freelance journalist and columnist. His poetry and illustrations are also among his published work. His writing style is concise, simple and humorous leaving room for interpretation. He currently resides on the East Coast.

AuthorHouse is the premier book publisher for emerging, self-published authors. For more information, please visit

ForWord Review book review

Posted in Uncategorized on May 30, 2011 by alanburton09
ForeWord Reviews


From a Window or Two

Memoirs of a Distant Mind

Home > Book Reviews > Nonfiction > Literary Collections > From a Window or Two

Clarion Review (4 Stars)

When a book cover pictures the author wearing an oversized paper-m&226;ché fish head readers can be assured that its contents will be amusing. From a Window or Two delivers a healthy portion of witty lively and self-deprecating writing but there are also some morose reflections and even despair-ridden poetry in this volume which shows the diversity of the writer.

The first part of the book “Fish Out of Water” contains the author’s vignettes about parenting the differences between men and women water skiing football the New Math and other gently humorous topics. Burton’s writing is full of staccato lines that usually end with a joke and show his bewilderment at many Americanisms even though the former Brit has lived in the U.S. for more than thirty years. These essays read easily as if the author were chatting with the reader at a backyard barbeque or driving around to yard sales and commiserating about warning signs (“Those who want to turn a profit on old TV Guides wear money belts”).

“Confessions of an After-School Teacher” follows next with the same breezy humorous tone and consists of humorous short pieces about the impossible task that Burton and his two colleagues face each day with their overexcited brood. One week they are told to organize a talent show for parental viewing; the next they must produce a puppet show. The author’s affection for his charges shines through his veneer of exasperation and the sketches are all very funny particularly his exaggerated description of kids’ winter gear and luggage. Parents will no doubt enjoy his summation of herding forty seven-year-olds on a field trip to the movies: “A vomit a movie and a mint.”

From this point Burton leads on with an increasingly darker series of writings. First up is a poetry/essay collection “The Misfits” about time spent in an alcoholic shelter. The tone gets bleaker with “Tales from Behind the Wall” about two weeks of court-mandated residence at a psychiatric hospital although Burton still manages wry commentary about mean matrons and the dangers of wearing hats. Finally the book concludes with “The Withering” and its compilation of poems about pain suicide disappointment alcoholic mothers and an alarming fantasy about smothering a whiny elderly woman at a diner in her plateful of eggs.

Burton is a compelling writer throughout these pieces. Despite the overuse of a few pet phrases (“you see” and “girding my loins” for example) and a few too many essays about his neatnik girlfriend he comes across as an interesting and engaging presence. His honesty in portraying all the facets of his life is admirable and interesting if sometimes harrowing in the later sections and prevents this otherwise diverse compilation of writing styles from rambling. As an autobiography this disparate collection shows both his amusing adventures and his troubles and therefore succeeds as a whole.

Rachel Jagareski
March 13, 2009

Book Information

Cover Art
From a Window or Two
Alan Burton
Burton Alan
Literary Collections
Publication Date
Dec 1, 2008
Type of Binding
Number of Pages

A Wayward Wizard’s Wistful Words

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , on March 26, 2009 by alanburton09

Well, friends, this is my second book offering: ‘A Wayward Wizard’s Wistful Words – A Little Book Of Quotes.’

Quotes, by their very nature, are the most concise method of using language to describe specific events, feelings, questions, and answers. Quotes vary from the absurd, to humorous, to thought provoking.

My quotes are no different. They span several years, often set aside for a time after they were composed, and now resurrected in this book.

Example: “Some people have mood swings. Not me, though. I have a mood swing set.”

Quotes help to define the absurdity that seems to hover over my life. Humor is life with a little twinkle, and absurdity is humor with the gas pedal to the floor.

I revel in this state of being, and I hope you often do too. Sometimes we need, not to make the world stop, or to get away from it, but simply to describe it from a different point of view.

This helps to readjust our focus, and enjoy the moments we have just a little more for what fleeting joy they bring us, and not just get beaten down by the world and it’s hardships.

My quotes are composed to provide a written chocolate treat to those who have a verbal sweet tooth.

I hope that you enjoy these, and remember that this is simply a: ‘coffee table/stocking stuffer’ effort, and nothing more pretentious than that.

Quotes are just quotes. Some people like them, some don’t.

I hope that most of you do, and that this ‘blog’ will stimulate conversations and ideas to share.

Although being somewhat computer literate, and able to navigate about a bit, this medium of ‘blogging/chat room’ websites is quite new to me. Communication on the internet has been limited to emails for me thus far, and this new method of advertising my work, and having it be a more personal event as such, is quite exciting to say the least.

I look forward to chatting with people about this book, quotes in general, ‘From A Window Or Two – memoirs of a distant mind’ – my other book, and anything else that comes to mind.

I sincerely hope that you enjoy my work, and I look forward to chatting with many of you soon, online and ‘blogging’.

Thank you,



From A Window Or Two

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on March 26, 2009 by alanburton09

This is my first attempt at ‘blogging’, and is undertaken in the hopes of promoting my new book: ‘From A Window Or Two – Memoirs of a Distant Mind’.

This is a provocative look at my life as a series of captured moments in time.

Some of these might have a ring of familiarity to you, and some might not.

However, I feel that they do demonstrate the various ways that we remember ourselves by looking at what has happened to us, why and when.

This work deals with relationships, children, friends, events, and thoughts, that mirror my often peculiar development as a member of this human race.


Life is a series of moments on a string, following each other toward an unknown destiny.

Here, in this book, I try to isolate – albeit briefly – some of those moments of mine, so I can revel in the absurdity of my life in these times.


Since there is not a truly consecutive nature to many moments, I have divided this work into sections rather than traditional chapters. This way I can include various themes and directions that my life has followed without encouraging a chronological ‘page by page’ approach to reading them.

In this book I write from both a humorous standpoint, as well as the distinct opposite.

My hope is that what I offer here will reach those seeking a slightly different appreciation of life’s various threads, thus demonstrating the abundant polarities of the human condition.


I do hope you take the time to read, and hopefully enjoy these writings, and return this ‘blog’ with conversation and comments, which I shall respond to with pleasure, in hopes of developing a dialogue about life and it’s multitude of peculiar moments.

A writer is a creature who lies exposed and naked between the pages – if he so chooses –

and, for me, it’s the only way to be. The life rustling between those pages is what engages my mind, and allows my words to flow.


This is why I enjoyed creating this work so much, and this is why I submit it to you.